NEW California Welcome Brochure:
WELCOME ILLEGAL TRAVELER TO THE DYSFUNCTIAL REPUBLIC OF CANNABISFORNIA (formally known as California)
We welcome all, documentation is not a requirement. Please read carefully the following guidelines concerning your stay in our Republic:
1) You are no longer allowed to travel by a fossil fuel mode of transportation within our domain, if you do have the means to provide a renewable source of energy vehicle (electric), recharge ability is available on sunny days only. We recommend either foot pedal or sail. The republic is carbon free.
2) Foot travel is restricted to only bio-degradable foot wear, as we are a non-plastic or artificially manmade products region, only natural apparel is approved within our borders.
3) If you wish to continue your travels to other destinations farther north, we have included a map of our most favorable watering springs along the major pathways (as we no longer provide bottled water), food also is available at immigrant way-stations (you may receive a ration card at a way-station) refried beans and rice will be dispensed (flagellant beef or any animal by products are prohibited).
4) Temporary housing will be provided for you, if during your stay, you require shelter, palm branch substations are indicated in the red dotted area’s of the map. (nylon tenting is no longer allowed within the Republic). Other wise feel free to use any of our beautiful parks or for the more adventurous, our public sidewalks, for your camping pleasure.
5) If you require hypodermic syringes for any medical need, they are dispensed for free at any of our Public Medical Dispensers. Smoking in public is allowed in designated areas, Tobacco is the only substance not allowed.
6) Attention: to expecting mothers, all medical facilities are open and free to you, but all newborn’s are subject to the Republic’s Logan Infant Viability Laws upon birth.
7) You are encouraged to use and enjoy all of the republic’s public services, no questions asked or identification required. Some areas are not subject to the republic’s control, if you find your self in one of these uncontrolled areas, you may need to abide by the local gang lords rules.
8) We hope you enjoy your stay and have a HIGH time.
THESE APPLY ONLY IN AREAS UNDER THE CONTROL OF THE DYSFUNCTIAL REPUBLIC OF CANNABISFORNIA
Thank you taking the time to read this and hopefully and sadly enjoyed as much as I did.
P.S. I am sure some find this offensive, so do I, but it seems to be the future that a majority of Californians want.