Today’s Extra for Feb. 13: Best Valentine’s Day Gift Ideas for Someone Based on Their Love Language

Best Valentine’s Day Gift Ideas for Someone Based on Their Love Language

Valentine’s Day. Love it or hate it, it’s almost upon us. (I know, wasn’t it just Christmas?) A lot of people think it’s just another excuse for retailers to get us to part with our moolah. But done right, it can actually be really special.

Rather than yet another heart-covered Snoopy card or stuffed animal (yawn), let’s put some thought into celebrating the day of romance this year. Let’s gift our significant other with something that speaks their love language.


If you’re wondering how on earth you’re supposed to figure out your partner’s love language, not to worry. Gary Chapman wrote a book called The 5 Love Languages: The Secret to Love That Lasts.

When the initial head-over-heels-ness of a new relationship wears off and life resumes a sense of normality, we forget to do the small things that let our spouse know we care.

Oftentimes, when we do remember, our efforts fall short of the mark. Not because we didn’t try, but because we used the wrong language. When we learn to express love in our partner’s language, our efforts will almost always be appreciated.

Helpfully, discovering your love language is as simple as taking a quick online assessment. Based on your responses, it then identifies your primary love language, explains what it means and helps you use it to connect more intimately with your person.

Your love language essentially sums up what you value most in a relationship. For some people it’s receiving a gift or token of appreciation, for others it’s spending quality time with a loved one. When you know your partner’s love language it’s suddenly a lot easier to understand why your last gift wasn’t a hit with them.

Words of Affirmation

As it implies, this language uses words to affirm other people. Whether you express your love verbally, via text message or in an old school letter, doesn’t matter. The important thing is to choose your words thoughtfully.

Gift idea: Grab a sheet of paper or open a new Word doc and get writing. Don’t worry about being a literary genius or anything. Just focus on saying how you feel in an honest and heartfelt way. List the things you love most about them, big and small. Let them know you notice these things even if you don’t always say as much.

Then, roll it up, tie it with ribbon and add a wax stamp. You could also wrap it in tissue paper or put it in an envelope covered in geeky stickers. You can give it to them as is, but going the extra mile with the presentation will knock your home run right out of the ball park.

Acts of Service

For these people, actions speak louder than words. There’s no point buying them roses or telling them how much they mean to you, they want you to show them. Something as simple as taking on the lion’s share of the housework when they’re stressed at work will mean the world to them.

Gift idea: Make a romantic Valentine’s Day dinner for the two of you. If you can’t cook, make something basic. The fact that you made the effort is what counts here. Also, and this is important, make sure you do the washing up afterwards.

Not feeling your inner-Nigella? What about making them a ‘Get Out of Housework’ free voucher to be used at their discretion? The fact that you’re willing to risk having to vacuum  and wash dishes at a moment’s notice is going to score you a bunch of points.

Receiving Gifts

For some people, what makes them feel most loved is to receive a gift. The trick is to give them something that shows how much you care. Take the time to make or buy a gift that’s personal, speaks to their tastes and shows you put a lot of thought into it.

Gift idea: Anyone can go to the store and buy a box of chocolates. You need to raise the bar a little higher than that. If hand making chocolate is too much of a stretch, then at least visit a quality chocolatier and put together a collection of their favorite flavors.

If you’re married to an earth-warrior, then make sure your gift is eco-friendly and if your spouse is vegan be sure to give them something that’s vegan friendly. A little effort and forethought goes a long way, is all I’m saying.

Quality Time

This language is all about giving the other person your undivided attention. They love the idea of the two of you hanging out together with no chance of being interrupted. The simple act of putting your phone away when you’re together will speak volumes.

Gift idea: Send the kids to grandma and have a romantic picnic in the lounge. Put on some music and just enjoy each other’s company. Without being too show-offy about it, make a point of letting them know your phone is not only on silent, but in another room entirely. It’s the little things.

Physical Touch

To this person, nothing speaks more deeply than appropriate touch. Getting physical means the world to them. Sex is great, but so is holding hands, hugging and scooching up close on the couch to watch a movie.

Gift idea: Give your love a Valentine’s Day to remember with a massage that shows exactly how you feel. Set the scene with scented candles, soft music and romantic essential oils. Remember, it’s about touch more than technique. Take your time and really get into the experience. Whatever you do, don’t cop out and give them a massage voucher for some fancy spa. That’s not the point.


Leave a Reply

Please log in using one of these methods to post your comment: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.